An Unlikely Event

Susie with the door.

One day Susie the safety card girl, who works for lots of airlines all over the world, decides to go on a holiday flight. Although she stars in the safety card brochure, in the seat pocket in front of you, it's hard to believe this could be Susie's first time on a real plane. But it is. During the taxi safety briefing Susie feels a little embarrassed, when some of the passengers on board the packed plane, notice her sitting in her customary seat. The one next to the emergency escape door.

Everything is normal on the flight until after the first round of drinks are served. Susie is a little bored. 

      "Hmmm that martini has gone straight to my head," Susie thought as she looked around for something to do.

Looking at the door, that in the unlikely event will ever be used,  conditioned reflex makes Susie snatch it out of it's place on the wall, leaving a gaping hole. All the passengers are very frightened.

Susie chucking the useless door out the hole.

Emergency noises and announcements come thick and fast, Susie is getting frightened,  she throws the useless door out the hole in the wall. Susie gets even more frightened when she sees the plane is in a dive because the door gets sucked into one of the two engines on the plane. While the engine is chewing the door, the cabin fills with smoke, it smells like burning oil and plastic. 

                     "This isn't what the safety card says will happen," Susie screams at the horrified passengers who are all looking at her for guidance.  

            "What the fuck are you looking at me for?" Susie screams over the noise of the wind rushing in the hole, and the sound of the engine finally exploding because of the door ingestion.

            "You are the safety chick," a passenger yells between bouts of horror at the realisation the jet is diving to it's death, with all on board.

            "I'm on holiday," Susie screams. "I'm out of here this is a pretty crappy way to spend your holiday if you ask me." 

Susie steps out of the exit, the wind rush instantly forcing her off the wing. 

Suddenly, Susie realises she is floating and twirling in the quiet air, she is back on the safety card again and the holiday is over. She watches as the plane has a rough landing in the field below her. As she floats down, the passengers are leaving the plane by the emergency exit door just like Susie shows them on the card.

Susie's card floats toward the crash site and is caught by a little kid.

        "Mummy thats the lady from the plane look," the kid says. "Can I keep her?"

        "Yes keep it, after all if it wasn't for the girl on the safety card, we wouldn't be here," the mother says as she scoops up her little boy, relieved they are walking away from the crash.

Susie smiles as the little boy forces her into his crowded backpack, the one he was supposed to leave on the plane, in the unlikely event that anything nasty could happen on a flight.